The Nervous System Is Not a Problem to Fix
August 5, 2025
In the face of stress, anxiety, or trauma, many people come to therapy thinking, “What’s wrong with me?” or “How do I fix myself?” At Presence of Mind Therapy, we meet these questions with compassion and with a reframing that often brings a deep sense of relief: Your nervous system is not broken. It’s doing exactly what it was designed to do.
Your Nervous System: An Ally, Not an Enemy
The nervous system is your body’s internal communication network. It manages how you respond to the world around you; whether that means preparing for danger, engaging in meaningful connection, or allowing you to rest and recover. When people talk about feeling “anxious,” “frozen,” or “numb,” they’re often describing a nervous system response that’s gotten stuck in overdrive or shutdown due to overwhelming experiences.
But here's the key: these responses are not failures. They are evolutionary adaptations, or your body’s way of protecting you when something feels unsafe or too much to handle.
Regulation, Not Suppression
At Presence of Mind Therapy, our work is not about controlling or suppressing your nervous system. Instead, we help you understand it, befriend it, and learn how to regulate it with care. That means learning how to move between states of activation (like stress or anxiety) and states of calm or social engagement with greater flexibility and awareness.
Your Nervous System: An Ally, Not an Enemy
How We Support Nervous System Regulation
At Presence of Mind Therapy, we support nervous system regulation through an integrative and compassionate approach that honors the whole person: mind, body, and spirit. Whether through talk therapy, somatic practices, spiritual exploration, or ketamine-assisted psychotherapy, our clinicians help clients learn to understand and respond to their internal states with greater awareness and care. Rather than trying to override or suppress difficult emotions, we create space to explore what your nervous system is communicating and why. With this deeper understanding, you can begin to cultivate tools that bring balance, resilience, and a greater sense of safety within yourself.
Learning a New Language of Safety
When we stop seeing the nervous system as something to “fix” and start learning how to listen and learn from it, everything changes. We begin to understand that anxiety is often a signal, not a flaw. That dissociation is a coping strategy, not a defect. And that healing is not about achieving constant calm, but about becoming more skillful at navigating the waves.
At Presence of Mind Therapy, we’re here to walk with you on that journey. To help you build a deeper relationship with your body, your emotions, and your inner world. You don’t need to be fixed. You need to be met with presence and compassion.
Ready to reconnect with your body and build a sense of safety from within? Give us a call at (908) 663-2441 or email us at newclient@presenceofmindtherapy.com
Ready to reconnect with your body and build a sense of safety from within? Give us a call at (908) 663-2441 or email us at newclient@presenceofmindtherapy.com
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Between the news cycle, decreasing hours of sunlight everyday, and the chaos associated with the upcoming holiday season, it would make a lot of sense right now if you’re feeling stressed. Or really stressed. For what it’s worth, you’re in good company—according to the American Psychological Association, 89% of people say they feel increased concerns this time of year around things like social pressure to make the holidays ~perfect~, spending too much money, food/alcohol issues, and family drama. Does any of that ring a bell? (If it does, congrats! You are definitely a human being.) While tempting, you don’t have to turn to self-destructive coping choices like isolating yourself or relying on substances right now. You have other options. These are some of my favorites, all borrowed from DBT: 1) Practice accepting emotions as pieces of information. When you’re feeling a strong feeling, name it. Own it. Allow it in. Validate it. Assume that you’re experiencing it because your body is trying to protect you. Thank yourself for having received the info, and accept that even if you don’t know why that emotion is getting kicked up for you, it probably makes sense from a perspective that you’re not considering right now that you can unpack later in therapy. 2) Cope ahead. Picture ahead of time how certain stressful situations will likely play out during the holidays, and make a literal plan on what you’re going to do in different scenarios to keep your stress regulated. Work with your therapist to explore skills from setting boundaries to deep breathing for moments that feel particularly tricky. 3) Remember that you always have four options to choose from when trying to solve a problem: Change the situation (even if that means leaving it or opting out entirely) Learn to love or at least feel better about the problem so that it isn’t a problem anymore Tolerate and accept both the problem and how much you hate the problem Stay miserable and do nothing For example: Let’s say you secretly hate eggnog, and your family has a yearly eggnog appreciation event. Here are some of your choices: A. Don’t go to the event. Plan something fantastic to do by yourself that day. (Remember: Alone time is not the same thing as isolation!) B. Go all in with a green suit and make being the Eggnog Grinch your fun new role at the party C. Let yourself hate eggnog and the party, and go anyway—but while you’re there, commit to internally experiencing the party as though you were an anthropologist studying a particularly peculiar group of people D. Continue to secretly hate eggnog, go to the party, and try again in 2025 If you go with option D, it’s definitely going to be worth exploring in therapy 🙂 If you or someone you know needs support now, call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org/chat. If you’re experiencing an emergency, call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room. Written by, Rachel Christensen, LMSW
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The body remembers even if the mind forgets.
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The post Healthy Boundaries: What Are They And Why Do We Need Them? appeared first on Presence Of Mind Therapy.
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